


map that leads to you

by trademistakes



Category: Football RPF
Genre: (i don't know how to do tags), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Marvel Fusion, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, hey it's betaed already anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-31
Updated: 2014-08-31
Packaged: 2018-02-15 12:00:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2228247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trademistakes/pseuds/trademistakes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was falling the last time Mats saw him. He was falling down and Mats couldn’t grasps those his hands. The warm hands he usually held before they went on a serious mission. Mats had always been possessive, especially about him, the one and only old friend (who is at the moment his copartner and maybe more than a friend). That time, Mats was failing since all of his victories. </p><p>It was an eternal nightmare, a never ending horror that haunted Mats. something he will never get over.</p>
            </blockquote>





	map that leads to you

**Author's Note:**

> beta-ed version and i would like to say thank you to Gi for helping me with the grammars and kindly enough fixing them and giving advice. 
> 
> to the line group dudes (and especially Zah because she is the one to encourage me to do so-- thanks) for their support. 
> 
> and finally-- i write something in english since a long time. i'm more comfortable writing in indonesian though so for indonesian readers please do except some new indonesian football fiction.

They are on top of a building. Mats isn’t sure how the bloody hell the chase ended up with a dead end on top of a skyscraper. The building is ridiculously tall and abandoned, but why the hell should Mats care about its history and how tall  it is is a mystery, when he knew the thing he should be focusing himself on is this mission ~~,~~ and not anything else

His target is now in front of him, so hey, this is quite close to victory in Mat’s opinion. He can smell another completed mission coming. Joachim and Jürgen will congratulate him and there will be an after-mission party with his other colleagues. Mats can really smell it.

Assassin. Mats doesn’t care about the real alias about this one target, but he (Mats is being confident about the assassin being a he—hey, assassins usually are a he).Regardless, there is no escape now. Even if Mats is barehanded and the assassin has his sniper, Mats still sure that he can do this.

The man turns around, so that they are now looking at each other. The man’s gaze locked with his own, Mats can’t help but to inhale sharply. This is the first time he ~~c~~ an look and examine the man in detail.

Everyone had told him how dangerous the assassin is, how he killed a lot his targets successfully. Now that causes Mats to shiver— this one assassin is actually pretty dangerous. Then he begins to realise some few things. Some simple things that causes his eyes to widen. Mats guesses that by now his face must be paled, his lips might be trembling too, although he isn’t sure about the lips part. Not yet.

His dark hazel eyes meet dark blue eyes, almost black, but still blue.. That eye colour reminds Mats of someone ~~.~~ but no, he can’t he the assassin. Mats knows him all too well, far too well.

And then his gaze moves to the dirty blond hair the assassin has. Mats used to ruffle that kind of dirty blond hair. It’s odd that he can still remember the smooth, soft hair he used to thread his fingers through. The owner of the hair would always spat a little. Later, a simple smile draw on his lips and Mats realised that he actually enjoyed. He, him, his sunshine.

Thomas. The name Mats has been avoiding but now he can only think about. No, it can’t be. All this time he thought Thomas was dead.

This is just another dream, isn’t it? And when Mats closes and opens his eyes, he’ll be seeing stars at night and realise that he has been dozing off again. Not far from where his current position is, he will be seeing his fellow colleagues having barbecue party, celebrating another successful mission like they always do. Unfortunately, everything is crystal clear right now. He knows that this isn’t a dream, this is the reality that he’s facing reality here.

The fact that this man, this one close friend of his who has been gone (dead, dammit, he was dead and Mats saw everything way too clearly) for around eight years— is now right in front of him.

“Thomi?” his voice sounds desperate. He sounds as if he is begging, as if he wants the man to tell him that this isn’t real. No, he doesn’t want Thomas to just laugh and tell him this is all a joke. A joke can’t last for eight— actually, almost nine years now. Mats can’t be fooled that easily, anyway.

The one he called Thomi (Thomas, but Thomi was his nickname) or the assassin as how the others said— looks at him confusedly, both eyebrows rising. Mats’ heart sinks at the look Thomas gives him. It is the look of confusion, yet, serious at the same time, almost looking as if he, Thomas, is trying to intimidate him, but Mats isn’t afraid. That man is Thomas, the one sent to kill a lot of Mats’ colleagues and some of the Prime Minister and President’s bodyguards. The one to receive the nickname “The Assassin of 21st Century”. It’s Thomas.

There is this quiet moment for a second or so. Mats can feel the breeze and the intense atmosphere around them. He doesn’t want to fight. He doesn’t want the man to say a word. He wants Thomas to react, to say something, at least so that Mats can see if the voice the man has belongs to his dearest Thomas or not. He is, however, anxious about that as well. He doesn’t want Thomas to say something that causes his heart to sink ~~~~deeper. The assassin clutches his sniper tighter. Mats notices the action and quickly takes a step backward. His shoulders stiffen. The hazel coloured eyes of Mats look cautiously at the dark blue ones of Thomas.

“Who,” the assassin’s voice was low and serious, cold and thick. Something stabs Mats’ heart when he hears it

Eight years he thought Thomas was dead. Eight years he has been living in guilt. Eight years of nightmares and a lot of sleepless nights.

And it is Thomas’s voice. It’s the voice Thomas used when he was scared, when he was lonely. Mats was never fond of that one.

The one he liked was the cheery one. The one that Thomas usually used when he was flirting with someone, or the one Thomas used when he wanted to buy something, but he needed some extra money (or really Mats would say that one was the flirting kind Thomas used when Thomas’ around him).

This Thomas is different, but still, he is Mats’ Thomas. Mats’ dearest friend, his dearest star who stopped shining and yet now there he is. Although now the light Thomas produces is different.

It’s different. It’s not like seeing an old friend. It’s not like seeing an enemy either. Mats isn’t sure what it is, to be honest. It _should_ be like seeing his enemy. Like seeing a government enemy, to be exact. He’s no longer sure about that now, though.

Mats still can’t believe that the man, the assassin—is the one and only Thomas Müller.

“Who the hell is Thomi?” Thomas’s voice as he speaks to Mats is the real deal.

Mats can’t believe the cold and stoic tone in Thomas’s voice. And then the question. That question. He feels another stab on his heart, right where he always put Thomas inside. Where he keeps those beautiful moments he had spent with Thomas. Everything.

Including the day he lost Thomas, of course.

Mats predicted the question already. From the moment he blurted out Thomas’s nickname to the moment he realised that it had always been Thomas. He prepared ~~of~~ for getting hurt by the question, by the response Thomas gave him.

And yet, he still ended up standing there, frozen in shock, doing absolutely nothing.

Thomas walks closer without Mats even realising it, since he’s still in shock. The truth hurts. His partner, Cathy, said that a lot. Mats **never thought the truth could hurt him**. Not until now. Cathy. Is he forgetting about Cathy already? Mats’ exhales. Fuck Cathy. Cathy has always been so loyal to him, even after she confessed about how much she loved him and he didn’t feel the same. The words ‘truth hurts’ came from Cathy’s mouth when Mats told her why he couldn’t feel the same.

He told her that he’s in love with a dead man. With his past partner. With the man who was always there for him.

He’s in love with the man who never took things seriously. The man who held his hand and kissed his knuckles before they went on another mission. They’re agents, they never knew if they would survive a mission or not. Thomas usually said childish things, sang and even teased their target as he and Mats caught them.

(paragraph break) At the same time, Thomas would be the one to think of a plan, an idea on how to escape the current situation. His plans always worked, too. That’s why Mats cherished Thomas so much. He might be the kind of young lad that annoyed you with his curiosity at first, but the more time you spent with Thomas, the more you knew he was the one brilliant kid.

“Thomas?” the hazel of Mats’ eyes darken when he realises Thomas is now standing close to him. Not too close, but close enough. He can see the dark blue eyes much more clearly. the eyes are indeed the blue ones that Thomas have.

Thomas doesn’t reply and why would Mats expect him to reply, anyway? Instead he starts to raise up his sniper, aims it at Mats. Right where Mats’ heart  is. Mats knows this is getting serious, much more depressing for him as well.

It’s too much for Mats. Too much for him to accept the truth.

What happened to Thomas? Mats shakes his head in disapproval of the question he thought of. No time for questioning that, not when Thomas is aiming a bloody sniper at him. Not when Thomas doesn’t seem to even know who Mats is. Still, he can’t stand this. He needs to know why. He needs to know what happened and who did this to Thomas.

He ended up asking the question, curiosity killing everything. “What happened to you?” Mats knows that he sounds as if he is pleading, which he never does, but this is way too weird and yet logical as well. Mats realises that Thomas has stopped moving. ~~~~

Thomas raises both of his eyebrows yet again, still in the ‘shooting’ position. Mats secretly wishes that Cathy and the rest of their squad would come and help him with the current problem he is facing. Thomas. His main problem is Thomas. The assassin or whoever they call him is not Mats’ main problem. Hey, Mats has been working as an agent for a long time, he’s faced a lot of assassins.

But this one is Thomas. This is a different case for him.

“What happened to me?” the coldness strikes yet again. Mats has to bite his lower lip because of it. Who is responsible for this? Who is the one to brainwashed Thomas? No, this is not the Thomas that Mats wants to see.

He wants the Thomas who would wrap his arms around his neck after yet another successful mission. Mats wants the Thomas who gets drunk so easily that Mats has to carry him all the way back to his house. The Thomas who always okay. The Thomas with the smile that could lighten his day even during the hardest mission.

“Yes,” Mats takes a deep breath, closing his eyes before he locks their gazes again. “What happened, Thomas?”

Of course the answer will be Thomas pulling the trigger or just another confused, yet cold, look.

Mats thinks this is the end. This is how he is going by being killed by his own Thomas.

“It’s simple,” Thomas says. Mats notices that Thomas is about to pull the trigger now.

Oh, so his earlier thoughts were correct then.

Mats does not run. Maybe he’ll dodge the bullet, but he can’t run. His mind might be telling him to attack Thomas, but his heart is telling him the complete opposite. His mind is weak against his heart, which it never happened in the past, not until now. After all Thomas is his weakness. Thomas will always be Mats ~~–~~ only weakness. ~~~~

“You are my mission” and with that, Thomas pulled the trigger.

Mats successfully dodges, but then Thomas is pulling the trigger yet again. Mats’ mind keeps on telling him to attack, to just tackle Thomas or punch him, but his heart is still telling him otherwise. His heart is also winning.

Mats hates this. He was about to say something, to yet continue his useless questions. but Thomas is faster than him. Thomas is faster than he was eight years ago.

Everything happens way too fast for Mats.

So he doesn’t dodge this one strike, nor does he run away from the battle in his mind and heart.

The second bullet hits him.

By that time, by time he gets shot, he can hear the sound of a helicopter flying above him. He hears Joachim and the voice of Cathy screaming as another bullet hits him. Mats falls to the ground shortly after the bullet hits his shoulder and his right leg.

His vision gets blurry while he is on the ground, breath hitching and body completely helpless, he can’t feel any movement when he tries to do. Thomas escapes quickly before Joachim or Cathy could shoot him. Mats vision goes completely blank after Cathy held him tightly. He can hear everyone trying to make contact with him. he just can’t do anything.

Rght now all he sees in the darkness is Thomas walking close to him, giving him a simple smirk when they are close enough and then a faint whisper.

“Welcome to the main nightmare of yours.”

 


End file.
